>be me at UC berkely
>not a student just passing through
>wearing a red coke hat
>i fucking love coca cola
>suddenly i hear chanting
>massive crowd surrounds me screaming
>"GOOD NIGHT ALT-RIGHT"
>"DOWN WITH FASCISTS"
>start getting hit from every direction
>try to fight but there is too many
>start thinking its the end when i fall to the ground
>as im being stomped i hear another scream
>suddenly all the protesters are being demolished by russians in track suits
>hearing "CYKA" from every direction
>in about 60 seconds the entire crowd is running, some of the russians follow, other brgin to squat and smoke
>one of them helps me up
>"do not be of fright tovarishch, we save."
>hands me a 40 oz, and a cigarette